The Light of Our Week
We couldn’t have asked for a better show for our last appearance at Søhesten.
43 teams joined us last night and we love them all. Many of you knew where you can find Santa Claus’s official house, shout SHARON around the house while drinking, and support Barbie’s new role as Chief Sustainability Officer (w/ laptop and cell phone!) Unfortunately (fortunately?) there were not many Genshin Impact anime body pillow owners out there. Maybe we don’t know you as well as we thought.
Louis Theroux’s Rye Smile at the Orgy showed up with a repeat performance, taking the top shelf bottle for the second week in a row. Fritz the Kat ordered a round of second place draft beers with Lunch Crew hot on their heels in third.
Definitely Not the Hookers definitely were the most average team, receiving the most average team and light applause. Ice Cubes were fantastic sports in last place who knew the exact identity of the mystery liquid by smell - an achievement on its own.
The rest of you? Thank you, from the bottom of our hearts, for playing this little show. Quiz will continue next week under new management with familiar faces that we think you are going to like!
Here’s the board:
1 . Louis Theroux's Rye Smile at the Orgy 70
2 . Fritz the Kat 67
3 . Lunch Crew 66
4 . Taquitos Chicos 65
4 . Where is Charlotte? 65
4 . Davidpedia and the High-Flying Birds 65
5 . Lille Meyer Tom 61
6 . Quizards 59
7 . The Last of Us 58
8 . Centaurlicious 57
9 . Fourth Placers 56
10 . Biden 2024 55
11 . Real Slim Shadies 54
11 . Wilhelm :) 54
12 . Copenhags 53
13 . I'm Stuck Step Bro 52
14 . C U Next Tuesday 50
14 . Taco Belly 50
15 . Futurologists 49
15 . Kitty Coke 49
15 . Østerbros 49
16 . Merlout 48
17 . Definitely Not the Hookers (most average!) 47
18 . Conquiztadores 46
19 . B-Team 42
19 . Catholic School Dropouts 42
19 . Looking for a Visa! 42
20 . Hold J1 41
20 . Laminators 41
20 . Quizards of Waverly Place 41
20 . Tinekels Bitches 41
21 . Muchachos 38
22 . Satan's Little Poptarts 36
23 . Happen 34
24 . Team Timo 32
25 . Rosie G and the Boyz 30
26 . Doritos 29
27 . Quizzards of Oz 27
28 . Silly Geese 23
29 . Last Place 21
30 . Ice Cubes (last place!) 20
31 . Flowers (DNF) 12
32 . Vicky's Grill 10
100 Years of Cholera
Last Tuesday was Søhesten’s international theme quiz, with 40 questions loosely based on all of the countries you told us you were from and 10 songs that may or may not have defined your early musical life.
One of the bartenders bought one of them as his very first iTunes purchase back when that was a thing. One of your quizmasters briefly had one of them as a ringtone back when that was a thing. Weird times.
39 teams represented their countries this week, with a surprising number of them knowing a lot about Argentine breakfast and having strong feelings about the exact title of the Numa Numa song. No one was alive to experience Lisztomania, though, so we won’t hold that against you.
Louis Theroux’s Rye Smile at the Orgy took their very first first place bottle while the Rocky theme played in the background. Lille Meyer Tom rolled into second place and excellent Eurodance knowledge helped the Futurologists saxobeat the fourth place team.
We assume the members of Ways Best enjoyed each of their 118.3 mLs of beer in their most average finish, while persistence and stick-to-it-tiveness brought Jems the last place prize.
The rest of you are from even more countries than we thought - we’ll have more international content next week! Here’s the week 16 board at Søhesten:
1 . Louis Theroux's Rye Smile at the Orgy 63
2 . Lille Meyer Tom 61
3 . Futurologists 57
4 . C U Next Tuesday 56
5 . Smarty Pints 54
5 . Østerbros 54
6 . Run In Circles 53
6 . Mass Debaters 53
6 . Drinking Team With a Trivia Problem 53
6 . Diego and the Dodos 53
7 . Stephen Hawking's Dance School 52
7 . Salt 52
7 . California Creamin' 52
7 . Beer Stains 52
8 . Cardamom Buns 51
9 . Toad Stools 50
9 . Quizteama Aguilera 50
9 . Manolis 50
10 . Taco Belly 49
10 . Seven Beers Down 49
11 . Ways Best (most average!) 48
12 . On Holiday 47
12 . Mixed Bag 47
13 . Quizzard of Oz 46
13 . Puddlers 46
13 . Merlout 46
13 . Cool Søhest 46
14 . Catholic School Dropouts 45
14 . Bye Bye Hansie 45
14 . Alliance 45
15 . CADs 44
16 . Anything 41
17 . Reserve Team 39
17 . Capybara Fanclub 39
18 . Batman 38
19 . Trashwich 37
20 . Jems (last place!) 34
21 . Quiz Yes 32
22 . Academics (DNF) 17
Severely Underrated Restaurant
We’ll give you a peek behind the curtain - while both of us appear to be upstanding knowers and askers of researched facts, our free time is filled with absolute abject garbage television. One quizmaster has specifically planned an American trip where the Sexy Unique Restaurant from Vanderpump Rules is the end stop.
We are not people to be trusted.
38 teams kicked off their påskeferie with us with expert recall of Copenhagen’s fancy/divey bars, European scientists and their units, and approximate knowledge of the number of Friends seasons. Interstate 10, however, is a made-up highway and will never be spoken of again.
Newcomers Gakkelakkerne took the bottle in first place last night, followed closely by C U Next Tuesday’s draft beers and Fourth Placers punching above their name in third.
Queso Manchego cheesed for the most average prize. Yes, we have used that joke before for them. No, we aren’t going to stop. Quizling were our official last place winners but in their mysterious absence Vamos à la Pajas got their mystery liquid.
Special thanks to our Season 1 League teams Østerbros, Fourth Placers, and Futurologists for a great eight weeks of shows. See your standings on the League Board here - prizes coming soon!
We have new jokes for the rest of you. Here is the week 14 board:
1 . Gakkelakkerne 60
2 . C U Next Tuesday 59
3 . Fourth Placers 58, 5 league points
4 . Østerbros Luxury Edition 57
4 . Quizards 57
5 . David Hasselhoff in Spongebob Squarepants Movie 56
6 . B-Team 55
6 . Weakest Links 55
7 . Easter Hares 52
7 . Hookers 52
8 . Culture Vultures 50
8 . Granola People 50
8 . Ice Hot 1 50
9 . Østerbros 49. 4 league points
9 . Sometimes Maybe Good, Sometimes Maybe Shit 49
10 . Culture Collection 48
10 . Pilot Report 48
11 . Happy Indictment Day 46
12 . Fried Liver Attack 45
12 . Fritz the Kat 45
12 . Who Invited Louis Theroux to the Orgy? 45
13 . Queso Manchego (most average!) 43
14 . De Overvindelige 42
14 . Les Gros Cochons 42
14 . Quiz Me Baby, One More Time 42
15 . Break It or Buy It Baby 41
15 . Taco Belly 41
16 . Adolf Quizler 35
16 . Three Germans and Me 35
17 . Fromage 34
17 . Ynkeby 34
18 . Dutchies 31
18 . Queens of England 31
19 . Three Six One 28
20 . Super Pug 27
21 . Vamos à la Pajas (last place prize recipients!) 26
22 . Quizling 25 (actual last place!)
23 . Dreamsucker (DNF) 7
Fils Fortuné
A tip of the hat to the teams who pre-game (and post-game!) the quiz with games of chess - it’s like chess boxing’s kinder cousin or the 37th chamber of Wu-Tang. Either way, we’re impressed.
40 teams went through all sorts of pre-game rituals last night and many of them paid off. You put up the highest average music round score (with three perfect scores!) in the show’s history, demolished the puzzle round, had expert knowledge of celebrity girlfriends, and endured infinite steamed hams. The author of The Seagull, however, remains an unsolved mystery and we hope to one day discover the truth.
The Østerbros, buoyed by striking river knowledge and undaunted from two nights of quiz in a row, ran away with the first place bottle and collected a few league points along the way. Well, This Was Embarrassing displayed their deranged sense of embarrassment by placing second, and Fritz the Cat made the correct choice of bottled beers in third.
Estoy Holanda’s pre-game ritual was to blow their table candle out - which was suspiciously re-lit when they joyfully split their most average beer. Monkstown’s post-game ritual was just staying in the bar longer than R.A.P., leading them to snatch their last-place prize from the jaws of victory.
Everyone else had rituals too secret and/or erotic to post on the internet. Here’s the week 13 board from Søhesten:
1 . Østerbros 70, 5 league points
2 . Well, This Was Embarrassing 60
3 . Fritz the Cat 58
4 . Conquiztadores 57
4 . Fourth Placers 57, 4 league points
4 . One is a Volvo 57
4 . Wilhelm 57
5 . Copen-hags 56
6 . Futurologists 55 , 3 league points
7 . Quizards 54
8 . Corgan Supporters 53
8 . Rooster 53
9 . Pretty Preps 52
10 . Anne, Sanne, and Quiz 51
10 . Drinks and Stuff 51
11 . Oldies But Goodies 50
11 . Peanuts and Tea 50
11 . Tåsingegang 50
12 . Estoy Holanda (most average!) 49
13 . Friends of Espen 1 47
13 . King Quizzard of the Lizard Wizard 47
13 . Nuclear Triad 47
13 . Representing Alsace 47
14 . Bron 46
14 . Hold Kæft 46
14 . Taco Belly 46
15 . Friends of Espen 2 45
16 . Newbies 44
16 . Urbcast Podcast 44
17 . Impro 42
17 . Vanini 42
18 . Belgian Team 41
18 . Dora and the Explorer 41
19 . C.A.T. 36
19 . Red Devil 36
20 . Agne With a Dot 34
21 . Adrians 32
21 . Cute Little Shits 32
22 . Monkstown (last place!) 29
23 . R.A.P. 28
Taco Belly
The show started out with a unsolicited shoutout for the Disgusting Food Museum across the bridge - so to even things out we’ll let you know that you should absolutely not try the hot sauces at the end of the tour as you will end up projectile vomiting into a Swedish train platform trash can. At least that’s what we heard from a friend of a friend.
The show pulled 37 teams last night and none were mid. We were pleased to see that you knew all about America’s greatest triumph over the natural world, remembered ol’ Gorm, and have scary accurate safari knowledge. Some of you haven’t had a Rum Swizzle, though, so get on that. Also - thanks to those of you that gave us responses to our unofficial country survey! We promise our intentions are good*.
Emerging from their eternal slumber, the Viqueens took the top spot at last night’s show, followed closely by the Futurologists in second place - creating a close league board. Frack Till You Crack extracted five bottled beers with a third place win.
Expert illustrators Willa’s Women received a comical pile of glasses and individual sips of beer as our Most Average team, and good last place sports Seating Kings put a dent in the bar’s off-menu Norwegian Surprise Fluid supply.
Everyone else was positively brimming with rizz. Here’s the week 12 board:
1 . Viqueens 64
2 . Futurologists 63, 5 league points
3 . Frack Till You Crack 61
4 . Fourth Placers 59, 4 league points
4 . Planners Gone Wild 59
5 . Team Team Effort 57
6 . Salt 56
7 . Let's Get Quizzical 54
7 . We Ate Noodles for Dinner 54
8 . Dyrlægevej 53
8 . Exquiz Me 53
8 . Kostas' Angels 53
8 . Quizzards of Oz 53
8 . We Thought This Was Speed Dating 53
9 . Deep Dish Dominators 51
10 . Willa's Women (most average!) 50
11 . Babushkas 49
11 . Tåsingegang 49
12 . Camaroon Chickas 48
12 . Louis Theroux's Rye Smile at the Orgy 48
13 . Saturdays are for the Boys 47
14 . Team #1 46
15 . Big 5 45
15 . CADs 45
15 . Mussi Hussi 45
15 . Østerbros 45, 3 league points
16 . ITU: Incredibly Terrifying Underdogs 44
17 . Gogonuts of the Gogonut Tree 43
17 . Group Therapy 43
18 . Purple Wheat 42
19 . No Eye Dear! 40
19 . Trivia Troika 40
20 . Juliæ 37
21 . Seating Kings 34 (last place!)
22 . Kalmar Uten Suensken 19 (DNF)
23 . So, the Weather? 7 (DNF)
24 . Cleveland Cups 0 (lost in space)
100 Dalmatians
Two notes from last night’s quiz:
Oliver and Company is the darkest, bleakest Disney movie in recent memory and yeah, we’ve seen Bambi.
We learned way more about Matador than we expected. Cultural exchange is alive and well.
39 teams got cozy and joined us in our witchy candlelit quiz sanctum last night. We were quickly reminded that a lot of you know about famous Italian sex-havers, some of you have read Where the Crawdads Sing, and a blessed handful of you know about some popes (in Latin, even). That said, consider putting some respect on Marit Bjørgen’s name, friends.
Cinderella story and lightly pornographic cartoon Fritz the Kat popped the bottle in first place, followed closely by second placers the Østerbros. An exciting shootout for third place left All the Way Around Suppy with a binary choice of beers.
Jennifer Coolidge of the 4th of July got two sips of beer each for their average level of knowledge and above-average level of Reese Witherspoon fandom.
Aclam’s Angels, the real last placers, dodged their shots of Danish Mystery Liquid, instead letting Jupiter and Venus take that bullet for them.
The rest of you did a great job humming a particular theme song. Here’s the week 11 board:
1 . Fritz the Kat 57
2 . Østerbros 56, 5 league points
3 . All the Way Around Suppy (third place tiebreaker winner!) 55
3 . Quokkas 55
4 . Who the Fuck Invited Louis Theroux to the Orgy? 54
5 . Don't Shout Into the Mic 53
5 . Quiz Quiz Bang Bang 53
6 . Beerded Ladies 52
6 . Fourth Placers 52, 4 league points
7 . Futurologists 51, 3 league points
7 . What's the Upside? 51
8 . Frenulums 49
8 . March Madness 49
9 . Illiterates 48
9 . Laminators 48
10 . Louis Theroux's Rye Smile at the Orgy 43
11 . Comfortably Dumb 42
12 . Jennifer Coolidge of the 4th of July (most average!) 41
13 . Billy's Girls 39
13 . Pepper 39
13 . Salt 39
14 . Adverse Possessions 37
14 . Tequila Mockingbird 37
15 . Crazy Quizmasters 36
15 . Finding Quiz 36
15 . Sex and the Quizz 36
16 . Gogonuts 35
17 . Allow Food Please 34
17 . Burning Candles 34
17 . Cultural Diversity 34
18 . Exquiz Me 33
19 . Architects 32
20 . PsyMatch 31
21 . Jupiter and Venus (last place by default!) 30
22 . Cato 29
23 . Emilovich 28
23 . Food Club 2.0 28
24 . Aclam's Angels (actual last place!) 27
25 . Lanternennes Vogtere (DNF) 24
Sock Pants
As people who are sort of from Chicago, we were excited to see actual real snow last night by the lakes instead of the usual sideways rain and endless night. 41 teams worth of people decided to abandon their personal safety and brave the winter storm, for which we are both deeply grateful and - as your Resident Old People - ready to scold you for.
You winter warriors showed off that you knew at least two European rail companies, at least one of the 22 named cats in Cats, and demonstrated your willingness to fight a large cat to the death. We also got some truly horrific answers for our question about ‘baby dipping’ (barnedåb), so uh, thanks for those.
The Quizzards had an absolute ripper of a game, stacking up 77 points and five glasses of fancy bubbles in first place. We’re fairly certain the Østerbros now can recite all of the draft beers on tap at the bar from memory with back-to-back second place showings. The Futurologists in third took their beers out into the winter blast, presumably before shredding the gnar at 23.00 at night.
Our buddies at Søhesten and CPH:DOX gave us a pile of extra prizes this week, with a pack of five tickets going to kayak-knowers Trist ‘An’ Pissed, an average amount of alcohol going to average team Kong Quiztians, and a pair of Danish Mystery Liquid doses to the good sports Gast in last place.
Next year, let’s make a documentary about quiz. You’re all starring in it. Here's the board for week 10 (and the League Board if you’re playing):
1 . Quizzards 77
2 . Østerbros 73, 5 league points
3 . Futurologists 72, 4 league points
4 . Hahvahd Yahd 71
4 . Louis Theroux's Rye Smile at the Orgy 71
5 . Trist 'An' Pissed (CPH:DOX ticket winners!) 67
6 . Tearin' Me to Pisces 66
7 . Fourth Placers 62, 3 league points
7 . Zeton 62
8 . Escape to Africa 58
9 . Postcard from Slagelse 57
10 . Always Late 55
10 . Bjarne Biceps' Børnehave 55
11 . Hotshot 54
12 . Krydderi Hylden 53
12 . Scandamericans 53
13 . Kong Quiztians (most average!) 52
14 . Beaver Tails 50
14 . Crossed Leggers 50
14 . Quizzards of Oz 50
14 . Rocket 50
15 . Smoked Meat 49
16 . Quizly Bears 48
16 . Rocket Dream 48
17 . Nido 47
17 . Smarty Pints 47
18 . Croque-Mémé 46
19 . Fake Finnish 44
19 . Tåsingegang 44
20 . Kanye Quizt 42
20 . Sankt Knuds 42
21 . Future Urologists 40
22 . Exquiz Me 39
22 . Ingermann 39
22 . Quiz Me Baby One More Time 39
23 . Clumsy Trolls 38
23 . Quizy Miss Lizzy 38
24 . Svennebanan 36
25 . Gast (last place!) 28
25 . Vad ska vi heta? (DNF) 28
26 . Last Team (DNF) 3
Sabrina Lil Witch
Not all heroes wear capes, especially the team that gave us the best (incorrect) answer we’ve ever seen in the show. We’ve secretly been working on an entire category based on some of the less-than-right answers we get - so make sure to file all your animatronic cat knowledge for a later date.
Last night, a tied-for-record 44 teams battled on the beaches, in the streets, and in the cloakroom, demonstrating their expert knowledge of people over 30, body part sizes, banjo pickin’ hits, and a surprising amount of Disney Channel main characters. We can’t blame you for not remembering Guy Berryman and because he’s a bass player, he doesn’t either.
We had an exciting result last night (especially for league teams!) as the Fourth Placers underestimated themselves all the way into the top spot. The Østerbros, rippling with pepper knowledge, followed up in second with Tåsingegang hot on their heels in third.
Above-average-named Trivia Chalamet won the mysterious most average prize while our ongoing Danish Mystery Liquid cultural exchange project continued with Mosh in last place.
The rest of you lil witches? You did great. Here’s the week 9 board:
1 . Fourth Placers 71, 5 league points
2 . Østerbros 68, 4 league points
3 . Tåsingegang 67
4 . Louis Theroux Rye Smile at the Orgy 65
4 . Quizzly Bears 65
5 . Mannen 64
6 . Futurologists 63, 3 league points
6 . Goblins 63
6 . Pandas 63
6 . Quizzards 63
7 . From Rich to Rags 62
7 . Viqueens 62
8 . In the Smoking Closet 61
8 . Los Ganadores 61
9 . Planners With Manners 60
10 . Secretly Cool and Not Invited 59
11 . Inshallah 58
11 . Laminators 58
11 . We Know the Owner 58
12 . MC^3 56
13 . Trivia Chalamet (most average!) 55
14 . Afterparty at la Plage 54
14 . Indoor Kites 54
14 . Nippletoes 54
15 . One is a Volvo 53
15 . Quizzycats 53
16 . How I Met Your Hangover 52
16 . United Drinkers (UDS) 52
17 . Trolls 51
18 . 3600 50
19 . Cannibalquizm 47
19 . Crying White Boy With a Guitar 47
19 . Taqman and the Pipette Girls 47
20 . Exquiz Me 46
21 . Bastards 44
22 . On the Floor 43
23 . Broder Skabbet 41
23 . Ze Dermans 41
24 . Easy On 40
25 . Triangle 39
26 . Mosh (last place!) 33
27 . Quiz (DNF) 12
Triple Lutz
There are only a few rules at QC - don’t cheat, always give a last place prize, and never ask the same question twice. We’re only able to do that last one because you keep writing great Round 4 bonus suggestions - so thanks for giving us cool things to learn and write about each week!
After all the teams mingled and formed and reformed in our cozy li’l quiz cauldron, we ended up with 43 teams last night playing for the privilege of free liquids. Many of those teams knew a lot about cartoon horses, Prince Harry’s undercarriage, and nearly worthless currencies.
C U Next Tuesday autotuned their way into first this week, once again narrowly escaping the grasp of the league for another week. Louis Theroux’s Rye Smile at the Orgy smiled for the second place picture with their Tails of the Whale, followed by Google in third receiving both light applause and a round of light beers.
We’ve never had a twosome in the most average slot, but ChatGPT filled that hole in our hearts with a very above-average result for a two-player team. Kippis cracked the seal on the recent re-stock of Danish Mystery Liquid this week in last place, christening the bar with their good sportsmanship.
Here’s the board for Week 8 - league teams (and people who want to join) can check their standings on the League Board here.
1 . C U Next Tuesday 64
2 . Louis Theroux's Rye Smile at the Orgy 61
3 . Google 59
4 . Østerbros 58, 5 league points
5 . No Ody Helps the Score 56
6 . You're a Quizzard, Harry! 54
7 . Fourth Placers 53, 4 league points
8 . Quizards 52
9 . Futurologists 51, 3 league points
9 . Goat Bastards (best round 4!) 51
9 . Quizie Cats 51
9 . Quizzle My Nizzle 51
9 . Wilhelm :) 51
10 . Sherlock Homies 50
11 . (Out)Standing Team 49
12 . Centralen 48
12 . Rövsmör 48
13 . QuizziWizzies 47
13 . Trivia Chalamet 47
14 . Jaldi 46
14 . Los Gamaderos 46
15 . Chat GPT (most average!) 45
16 . Arrrrgentina 44
16 . Ledge of Glory 44
16 . Slotham 44
17 . Know it Ales 43
17 . One is a Volvo 43
18 . Aussies 42
19 . Latecomers 40
20 . Dragons 38
20 . Rothaus 38
21 . Basecamp 37
21 . Giraffe 37
21 . Sea Snails 37
22 . Momentum 35
22 . Scotts Tots 35
23 . Beautiful Washing Machine 33
23 . Bøvmaren 33
24 . Slow Jumpers 32
25 . Nice and Easy 29
25 . Brierne 29
26 . Kippis (last place!) 28
27 . One Kasper (DNF) 21
There Are Too Many Islands
Happy Valentine’s Day, no one.
Just kidding - we were happy to see teams and assorted Tinder dates celebrating love last night by arguing over the locations, names, and number of Danish islands. 35 teams also knew a surprising amount about balloons and the wiggly fins of the Batmobile in Batman Forever. Contrary to popular belief, though, Zayn Malik does not have Lao Tzu’s entire body of work tattooed on his arm.
We kicked off Season 1 of our eight-week quiz league this week - thanks to the teams who joined! We take your six best games for the league, so registration is still open here at the league page. If you’re playing, check out the league board each week.
The Østerbros and C U Next Tuesday had an exciting shoot-out tiebreaker at the top spot, with the Østerbros using their Olympic knowledge to take the bottle and C U Next Tuesday dominating the Broadway music round for their second place pints. Long Tall and Quizzy watched a lot of TV - leading to a perfect visual round and third place.
Good sports Griegos split their most average prize five ways while gooder sports Bastards graciously accepted their round of Norwegian Surprise Fluid in last place.
Here’s the Week 7 board:
1 . Østerbros 52, 5 league points
2 . C U Next Tuesday 51
3 . Long Tall and Quizzy 49
4 . Bitchachos 48
4 . One is a Volvo 48
5 . Futurologists 47, 4 league points
5 . Isle of Louis 47
6 . What's the Upside? 45
7 . Hookers 43
7 . Quizzards 43
7 . Wilhelm 43
8 . Fourth Placers 39, 3 league points
9 . Ynkeby 38
9 . Galentines 38
9 . Laminators (because we laminate) 38
10 . Griegos (most average!) 37, 2 league points
11 . ACC 36
11 . Maddie's Kidz 36
12 . Money Gang 35
12 . Supercoiled Plasmids 35
13 . Crunchy Puffs 34
14 . Peasants 33
14 . Racoons! 33
15 . Beliebers 32
15 . Otto 32
15 . Valquizzers 32
16 . Expat Team 31
17 . Beavers 25
17 . Team USA 25
18 . Guardians of the Lantern 24
19 . 2nd Floor Club 22
19 . Unpleasant Women (DNF) 22
20 . Team Friendship 20
21 . Bastards (last place!) 19
22 . Unknown (DNF) 9
We Can’t Call Greece
Here at QC we care a lot about facts and we always try to own up when we make a typo and end up wronging an entire country.
So - to our Greek friends at quiz and to the rest of the Hellenic Republic, thank you for keeping us honest and reminding us your phone country code is +30. Thanks to your swift intervention, we caught the mistake and corrected everyone’s score sheets before prize time - our apologies!
With that off our chest, we are thrilled to announce that a record 44 teams started the quiz last, many of whom know a lot about bridges, can name all four of the Teletubbies (with song!), and have never, ever, heard of Souldecision.
Up at the top, a two-game ninth-to-first Cinderella story took place as The Futurologists took their first ever bubble bucket. C U Next Tuesday demonstrated their knowledge of batsmen and bowlers to take second place while the Østerbros claimed another round of bottled beers and a very witchy team picture.
The Quizzards conjured up a performance at the tip top of the bell curve as our most average team and the honorable last-place souls from Eej were the recipients of a new, even more unknowable amount of Norwegian Surprise Fluid.
The rest of you did great. So great, in fact, that we think you would have fun in the league. Here’s the week 6 board:
1 . The Futurologists 65
2 . C U Next Tuesday 64
3 . Østerbros (best round 4!) 63
4 . Eyems Toopid (best music round!) 62
5 . Quizzly Beers 57
6 . I'm not gonna say that 56
7 . Nick and the Goblins 55
8 . Lil' Nisse 54
8 . Wilhelm :) 54
9 . Interstitial musical chairs 53
10 . Murder at the disco 51
10 . The Kim Larsen gangbang 51
11 . You're a quizzard, Harry! 50
12 . Bio-Blasters 49
12 . Gabby and the gang 49
12 . Quiztina Aguilera 49
12 . That's incredibly offensive 49
12 . Who the fuck invited Louis Theroux to the orgy? 49
13 . Beerded Ladies 48
13 . Kabooz 48
14 . The Quizzards (most average!) 46
15 . Fabulous council 45
15 . Team Madsen 45
15 . Team Ynreby 45
16 . Quizzy whizzies 44
16 . Team hold ud! 44
17 . The body keeps the score 43
18 . Quiztalian 42
18 . Replik 42
18 . Team 16 42
19 . Suffolk and Watt 41
20 . Beersness Men 40
21 . Exquiz me 38
21 . The Böreks 38
21 . The Owlettes 38
22 . Oli might be late 37
23 . The black turtles 35
24 . I am Zlatan 34
25 . Edward BOOM 33
26 . Sugababes 28
27 . Underberg 25
28 . Eej (last place!) 24
Needs More WooHoo
We love you all dearly but we’re deeply concerned about your thoughts about the appetites of your Sims. That said, what you do with your fake people do in the confines of their fake homes inside the confines of your home is really none of our business.
41 teams demonstrated their frighteningly accurate knowledge about the entire line of Volkswagen cars, various international breads, and Mega Gengar, all of which are skills that you should put on your CVs. Use us as a reference, we’ll say nice things and absolutely will not tell your future employers that you don’t know where butterflies come from.
From a giant pile of teams came an exciting bunch of winners, not-winners, and exactly in-betweens, with three-peating champs the Østerbros returning to take the top spot, the bubbly bottle, and the notice of our Quizmasters who will seek to destroy them next week. Partial newcomers Quokkas chose their draft beers in second place, and Queso Manchego cheesed for the third place picture after winning a tiebreaker shootout with Rökta Räkor.
In the middle, we found Black Swans right around the quiz average receiving right around an average amount of beer and Seven in last place who lucked out - the bar ran out of Danish Mystery Liquid and instead provided them with a round of luksus Danish Surprise Fluid.
The rest of you are both mysterious and surprising in your own special ways. Here’s the week 5 board, and if you think you did well, consider joining the league!
1 . Østerbros 67
2 . Quokkas 62
3 . Queso Manchego 61 (third place!)
3 . Rökta Räkor 61
4 . Tallahassee 60
4 . Your Body Keeps the Score 60
5 . One is a Volvo 57
6 . Imagine Yanny 54
6 . Valesota is Back 54
7 . I Am Holland 53
8 . Miracle Team 52
8 . Sad Penguins 52
9 . Futurologists 51
9 . Pretty Average 51
10 . Killer Bees 50
11 . Black Swans (most average!) 48
12 . Hamburger Birthday Party 46
12 . THG 46
12 . Unpleasant Women 46
13 . Art Vandelays 45
13 . Jolly Awesome Kool Krew 45
13 . Quiztina Aguilera 45
14 . Hold 70's Års 43
15 . Halle Berry 42
15 . Kwick Trip 42
15 . Quizzy Adler Olsens Pussy Klub 42
16 . Guardians of the Lantern 41
16 . Viqueens (DNF) 41
17 . Baltics 38
18 . Hold Da Op 37
18 . Matmus Husvad 37
18 . Pussy Adler Olsens Quiz Klub 37
19 . Eco Warriors 36
19 . French Aussie Team 36
19 . Kerala Kids 36
20 . Adam og Rasmus 29
21 . Seven (last place!) 24
22 . BS Rentals (DNF) 7
Are You the Jackbox Guy?
Unfortunately, neither of us are The Jackbox Guy, even though we lived in Chicago at the same time as he did. We do have a confession to make, though, quizzers - the reason why no one can place our accents is because we’re not actually from Chicago but a city with exactly the most neutral American accent which will remain shrouded in mystery.
Speaking of mysterious cities, 37 teams proved their knowledge about the 52 Best Places to Visit, the cardboard surface of Mars, and WHITE DIAMONDS. Your Quizmaster also got the opportunity to present a torturous and terrifying crossword puzzle about bestselling authors - right after you all had a fantastic music round - just to bring you all back down to earth.
We’ve seen some shakeups at the top these first few weeks of 2023, with the Østerbros returning at full force last night to seize the bottle of Italian bubbles. C U Next Tuesday, knowers of a frightening amount of Sheffield football history, claimed their draft beers in second. Luke Skyhooker slid into third, making the coin-flip choice between two fine brands of bottled beer. Tast 4 nearly exactly hit the quiz average of 45.1 points and precisely divided their average prize four ways. Copenhagen newcomers Aliens in the Jar were the honorary Quizmasters Assistants of the night up at the bar and graciously accepted their last place prize / indflyttergave.
We’re glad the rest of you came, but don’t call us when you need someone to help you move. We’re old. Here’s the week 3 board:
1 . Østerbros 67
2 . C U Next Tuesday 64
3 . Luke Skyhooker 62
4 . Louis Theroux's Rye Smile at the Orgy 61
5 . Nobodies 60
5 . Wilhelm 60
6 . New Friends 58
6 . Quizzly Bears 58
7 . Los Pollos Hermanos 57
8 . Biowind 56
9 . Let's Get Quizical 51
9 . Pied Piper 51
9 . Quiz-ton Churchill 51
10 . We Need More Stools 50
11 . 3 AM Knitters 49
11 . Trailerpark 49
12 . Einstein (perfect visual round!) 48
12 . Quick Thinkers 48
12 . Quizpee Crème 48
13 . And 3 Brit Germans Walka 46
13 . Gade 46
14 . Tast 4 (most average!) 45
15 . Nørre 44
16 . Great Beauty 43
16 . Triple Cocks 43
17 . Jävla Tards 41
18 . Three Thou 37
19 . Texas Howdy 35
20 . Danmark til Ejderen 33
20 . Long Line 33
21 . Seagals 32
22 . Yey Yeey! 30
23 . Bonnie and Clyde (joined late but great music round!) 27
24 . De 3 Musketerer 24
24 . Quizzards 24
25 . Aliens in the Jar (official last place!) 19
25 . Bildov og Sønner 19
Hitting Keys at Random
It had to happen sometime. After a year of quiz and 1,057 teams (!) logged, we finally had two teams show up with the same name. The Quizzards and You Are A Quizzard, Harry (previously The Quizzards) had an intense face-off, proving that an infinite number of teams answering an infinite number of questions will eventually all choose the same name.
We had an astounding 40 teams play last night - many of whom knew their Latin, lured the Danish National Symphony Orchestra away to a petrol station, and spoke to their dogs (or horses, depending on your source) in German. I still don’t know how to pronounce ‘blndsundoll4mj’, though.
Not-Swedish but Swedish-inspired (?) team Röhta Räkor ran away with the first place bottle this week, followed by the Quizzly Bears making another podium appearance in second. The Viqueens tried to give C U Next Tuesday take the third place prize, but duelists' honor bound both to an exciting sculpture-themed shootout for the bottled beers.
The Østerbros took the most average prize, performing slightly less well than Østerbros (Taylor's Version), which proves that life imitates art.
Good sports Killquizzarna graciously accepted that sticky icky last prize and proved that every Scandinavian country knows every other country’s joke drink.
The bar nearly ran out of glasses, proving that you were decidedly not joke drinking. Here’s the board for week 2:
1 . Röhta Räkor 61
2 . Quizzly Bears (best visual round!) 59
3 . Viqueens 58 (shootout third place!)
3 . C U Next Tuesday 58
4 . Squeeze Me In (best round 4!) 57
5 . Louis Theroux's Rye Smile at the Orgy 55 we get it now
6 . You Are a Quizzard Harry 52
7 . Baseline 50
7 . Butt Sandwiches 50
7 . Hookers (best drawings!) 50
7 . Those Guys Again 50
8 . Leftover New Year's Cod 49
8 . Podders 49
8 . Quizzards 49
9 . Østerbros (Taylor's Version) 48
9 . Pretty Preps 48
10 . Condominimum 47
11 . Year of the Rabbit 46
12 . Almost Standing 45
12 . Cecily is Single and Ready to Mingle 45
12 . Latecomers 45
13 . Don't Leave 44
13 . Quizteama Aguilera 44
14 . Østerbros (most average!) 43
15 . La Gasolina 42
15 . Mr. & Mr. Smith 42
15 . Ooh La La 42
16 . Kippis 41
16 . Team JK 41
17 . Hold Up 39
17 . Replik 39
18 . My Friends are Moving Out 38
19 . Bumblebees 35
19 . Perserverando 35
20 . Squirrel vs. Monkeys 33
21 . Deez Nuts 32
21 . Los Pedros 32
22 . Chainsmokers 30
23 . Bnetza 25
24 . Nimis 23
25 . Killquizzarna 22
The Bar Serves Coffee, Too
Happy new year, everyone! We got polar vortex’d the whole time we were back in the United States for the holidays, so it was nice to return to a relatively tropical Danish winter. We enjoyed quizzing with you at Søhesten all the way through 2022 - and last night we had 21 teams get the 2023 quiz season off to a great start.
In the year’s first quiz, you disproved the existence of ghosts with a friendly reminder to check your furnace, decided it was Morbin time after all, and promptly forgot about Osiris. Since many of you are Cool Young People, you also dominated our list of EDM bangers that everyone will be listening to when they get around to going to the gym that one time in January.
Despite late joiners showing up and trying to snatch their crown, Hebo Witch took the last place prize by demonstrating their impeccable sportsmanship and enthusiasm for Scandinavian liquids. Kippis nailed the most average spot by showing off their ability to get nearly exactly 51.4 points, which is a neat party trick. At the top, Trump’s Accounting Team picked up third place despite asking us to give them 11,780 more points, Zolene rode to second place with their encyclopedic knowledge of hats, and the ViQueens took on a friendly solo player looking for a team with the knowledge they needed to jump to a first place berth.
The rest of you had your best games of the entire year. Here’s the board for Week 1:
1 . ViQueens 67
2 . Zolene (best visual round!) 66
3 . Trump's Accounting Team 62
4 . Iya, Y'alright 60
4 . Quiztina Aguilera 60
5 . Østerbros 59
6 . Busters Verden 58
6 . Scandoz 58
7 . Engineers 56
8 . Party Barn 54
9 . Kippis (most average!) 51
10 . Gigi Gugu 50
10 . Tres Amigos 50
10 . What's the Upside? 50
11 . Dutchies 49
12 . Send It (perfect music round!) 48
13 . Fluffy Returns 47
14 . Triangle of Awesome 45
15 . Hebo Witch (last place!) 39
16 . Oreblind (played late, still great) 32
17 . Quiztopher Walken (DNF, but that’s cool too) 21
A Country of Oskars
We love putting this quiz on for you every week – mostly because we’re rude and nosy and like hearing your stories about how you ended up answering questions about Renaissance painters/turtles at our favorite bar on Sølvgade.
I hung around a bit after quiz this week to talk with the winners, not-winners, and some of our long-time teams who are heading back to their home countries at the end of the year. Here’s my unsolicited commentary:
For the team with an American Midwesterner – there aren’t many of us here in Denmark, so we have to keep telling people what a corn dog is.
For the team that provided Icelandic pronunciation hints – I’m sorry the first thing I mentioned was the app.
For the team that asked me for romantic advice - someone gave you their number at quiz(!), a place where everyone specifically agrees not to be a jerk, so yeah, text them back.
For everyone else? I’m personally glad you know all the words to I Will Survive, I appreciated your enthusiasm about specific aardvarks, and promise to not ask Nordic stock market questions for the rest of the year.
In the winners and not-winners circles this week it was nothing but feel-good hits. Long-time team Quizzly Bears came out on top, followed by (presumed) newcomers Quiz-Mats, and exchange-student team One Last Ride went out with a bang in a third-place shootout with The Nordicans. Merry Quizmas experienced the full force of the Most Average prize, splitting a single Tuborg Classic between five people, and It’s My Birthday stayed on-brand with a round of shots in last place.
Here's the week 50 board for everyone else:
1 . Quizzly Bears 65
2 . Quiz-Mats 63
3 . One Last Ride 59
3 . The Nordicans 59
4 . The Quizzards 57
4 . Ze Germans and Friends 57
5 . C U Next Tuesday 55
5 . MERGER 55
6 . American Idiots 54
6 . Østerbros 54
6 . Pretty Preps 54
7 . Quizzerkonerne 52
7 . Social Rickrollers 52
8 . Brahms 1st 51
8 . Watercooler Chit Chat 51
9 . Heinrich XIII Cabinet 50
10 . Merry Quizmas (most average!) 46
11 . Quiz Pro Quo 45
11 . Unemployed Queens 45
12 . Mr + Mr Smith 42
12 . The Leftovers 42
13 . The Six from Six 41
14 . Zambombas 40
15 . Thank You Thomas 39
16 . Musketeers 36
17 . Kong Frederik X 35
18 . There's No Way!!! 33
19 . Madame Moustache 32
20 . I Like Sandwich 22
21 . It's My Birthday (last place!) 21
22 . The Shameful Ones (late join) 13
This was our last show for the year – you’ll have Guest Quizmaster Emeritus Christian in week 51, then we’ll see you after the holiday in January!
Sold Out Arenas
If you were one of the 33 teams playing at last night’s show, well, you know the rest.
This week we leaned heavily into two of Copenhagen’s favorite things: Christmas music for six months out of the year and wearing fantastically expensive designer sneakers to take the trash out.
You knew all about José Feliciano, copped all of the new Balenciaga drops, and had approximate knowledge of the female reproductive system. Approximate was good enough for this week, though, as our dear friends at Søhesten provided us another generous prize for our most average team. ‘Twas a Christmas miracle.
I’m Not Creative clearly traded their creativity for absolutely killer quiz knowledge and the first place prize. Geralt of Trivia and Eugeniuses had an exciting second-third-place sudden death shootout, with both teams winning beers of different qualities in containers of different volumes. In-sanity stuck around for the whole quiz, sliding gracefully into their last-place round of shots. 6 from 6 got four out of every six questions correct, which was exactly enough to snag the average prize.
The rest of you did great - here’s the board for week 49:
1 . I'm Not Creative 61
2 . Geralt of Trivia 60
3 . Eugeniuses 60
4 . Country Girls 56
4 . Where There's a Will, There's a Way 56
5 . Replik 55
6 . Østerbros 54
6 . Quizzly Bears 54
6 . Team On and Pumbaa 54
7 . Backstreet Girls 52
8 . Ravioli with Pumpkin 51
8 . Swedish Metal Bands 51
9 . Adam the Dehumidifier 50
9 . Others 50
10 . 6 from 6 (most average!) 49
11 . Dolphin 47
11 . Hvad Rimer på Quizz? 47
12 . Mr. & Mr. Smith 45
13 . Broke but Sexy 44
13 . Los Marcassimos 44
14 . Papas 42
14 . Peter Joined Us This Time 42
15 . Falafels 39
15 . Not Dolphin 39
16 . Third Wheel 38
17 . Quantum Girls 35
18 . We Overthink Team Names 34
18 . Sjovetyper 34
19 . Street Smarts 31
19 . Very Dark but Stormy 31
20 . In-sanity 23
DQ . The ViQueens 62
DQ . Best Idiots of America 9
Five Golden Rings
Our favorite part of quiz isn’t asking the questions, it’s getting to learn cool stuff about Denmark, Europe, and all of the other places you are from.
We didn’t know that there is an entire Danish set of gifts for the song the 12 Days of Christmas (a duck? with acorns? on its feet?), that the Danish spelling of the disciple James’ name (Jakob) is more accurate than the English spelling when compared to the Greek translation (Ἰάκωβος, for our Greeks, Iacobus for our Latins). We also didn’t know any of the names of the World Cup goalkeepers - but you did!
It was a tough quiz this week, but our nearest and dearest friends behind the bar introduced a Most Average prize to take the edge off for our most average team - Los Hombres, who we are both mathematically indifferent toward and inclined to award a round from the Gløgg Pot to. Klap Lige Hesten had enough of Danish Mystery Liquid and passed on their last place prize - we can’t really blame them (sorry).
At the end, we had an exciting third place shootout between I Hope My Teammates Show Up and Tim and the Kite Corners, with knowledge of Scottish economists splitting the two into beer winners and not-beer winners - a most ironic capitalist outcome. Second place went to C U Next Tuesday, buoyed up by their partridge and pear tree knowledge, and three points ahead in first place we found the American Idiots.
We also learned that 20% of the American Idiots have seen Bernie Sanders washing his clothes in the river outside of the Coat Factory or whatever, so I guess that’s cool.
The rest of you have really nice coats. Like suspiciously nice. Here’s the board for week 48:
1 . American Idiots 66
2 . C U Next Tuesday 63
3 . I Hope My Teammates Show Up (perfect timed round!) 61
3 . Tim and the Kite Corners 61
4 . Three Musketeers 56
5 . Mads and the Hobos 52
6 . Little Single Lady 51
7 . Østerbros 50
8 . Babagonoushes 49
9 . Almost Virgins 48
9 . Black Gloves 48
10 . Los Hombres (most average!) 45
11 . Danmarks Største Quiz Presidenter 44
11 . Probably the Best Team in the World 44
12 . Slav Pilgrim vs. The World 43
13 . Johnson (only knower of popular Danish authors!) 41
13 . Punctual Ones 41
14 . Los Taquitos Chicos 36
15 . Lonely Fans Mini 34
16 . Sexy but Broke 31
17 . Mr. and Mr. Smith 30
18 . PPP 28
19 . Lasse og Theodor 27
20 . Mezcalitos 25
21 . Horse Girls 24
22 . Klap Lige Hesten (official last place!) 22
23 . Esters Tøjte 20
24 . A.S.S. 15
If you’ve read this far, we have a special treat for you. Next week? Designer sneakers. Don’t tell us we didn’t warn you.
Nom de Quizze
As a strictly knowledge-based business we don’t give out prizes for good team names, but a good team name certainly can’t hurt. Here’s your Team Name Leaderboard for week 47 - the places are made up and the places don’t matter:
I Thought This Was a Swingers Club - (see you next week, tiger 😘)
Diversity All Day - (first test, i will not call you that)
No One Wanted to Help Me with the Name - (sorry about your group project)
In an evening immediately following a Danish draw in the World Cup, we learned absolutely nothing about Nicolas Cage, discovered that you have thoughts about pornography and Spain, and were absolutely gobsmacked that you knew the name of the Simpson family pets.
We apologize in arrears for disappointing the teams announced in second and third place as we had an exciting three-way tie at the top between Quizzards (3), Quiz Team (2), and What’s the Upside (1) ending in a sudden death shootout that decided the top spots.
We do not apologize for the cultural experience and round of Danish Mystery Liquid shots that last place team Mamma Mia received. Their review? “Gross.”
We love all 26 teams equally, except the ones that won and had funny names who we love more. Here’s the board for this week:
1 . What's the Upside 55 (knew something about Led Zeppelin!)
2 . Quiz Team 55 (knew something about Iran!)
3 . Quizzards 55 (see us next week for your third place prize!)
4 . Pretty Preps 54 (best round 4!)
4 . Shuufuu 54 (best music round!)
5 . We Hope Lars Didn't Murder Someone 51
6 . Obi-Wanna Know it All 49
7 . No One Wanted to Help Me with the Name 48
7 . Tast 4 48 (perfect visual round!)
8 . I Thought This Was a Swingers Club 46
8 . It's Chewsday Innit? 46
9 . Østerbros 45 (usurped the third place prize by just sticking around!)
10 . Diversity All Day 43
11 . Julian's Angels 42
12 . Monkeypox 41
12 . Watercooler Chit-Chat 41
13 . Nothing in my Container 39
14 . E-Zero 38
15 . Broke but Sexy 37
15 . Carambas 37
16 . Pancakes Tomorrow? 33
17 . Ida Hearts Cindy 29
18 . Arjol Kids 27
18 . Mubbi 27
19 . Mamma Mia 25 (all Italian!)
20 . Fashionably L8 11 (only two rounds, but very on-brand)
Baja Blasted
Part of our job as Your American Friends Who Are Insufferable Know-It-Alls is sharing the best (read: worst?) of American culture with you - and we really wish that you, our Danish friends, could experience the glory of a proper Fourthmeal. Spain gets it.
This week, we gambled (unwisely?) on a musical Before and After round, didn’t laugh at a bad joke, got real high-brow with classical music, and scrambled to find Czech friends.
We had an exciting shootout in last place this week, with SNL winning (losing?) the last place prize in a tiebreaker question with Popsicles, who narrowly dodged the honor of being dead last. With Latecomers in third and the coatroom-dwelling Østerbros in second, the absolute powerhouse twosome(!) of newcomers Team Zahle took the fancy bottle and the first place honors this week.
The rest of you? Congratulations on finishing a tough quiz this week! Here’s the week 46 board:
1 . Team Zahle (best round 4!) 56
2 . Østerbros 55
3 . Latecomers 54
4 . I Am the Anchor 52
5 . Swedish Metal Bands 51
5 . Ursula Goes Snorkeling 51
5 . Crazy People Who Love Fun 51
6 . Can I Get a Woof Woof 49
7 . Vanguard 47
7 . Banana 47
7 . 3 Elves 1 Grinch 47
7 . American Idiots 47
8 . Mr. & Mr. Smith 44
9 . 7 Forever (best music round!) 43
9 . Friends of Espen 43
10 . Taquitos Chicos 42
10 . Power Puff 42
11 . Self S Team 41
11 . Floensost 41
11 . Fineapples 41
12 . Seaborg are Shit! 40
12 . Quiz in My Mouth 40
12 . Water Polo 40
12 . Bastards 40
13 . Yesterday's Brie 38
14 . Strategy Heroes 37
15 . La Quiz Royale 35
15 . Vertic Heroes 35
15 . Let That Sink In 35
16 . Guardians of the Lantern 34
16 . Watercooler Chit Chat 34
17 . Queens of Quiz 33
18 . Popsicles 29
18 . SNL 29